Chapter Two
"What is going on here? You did not tell me that you were having a yard sale." Jeff barged in with his hands full of bags from our favorite diner. I was going to miss that diner.
"I'm moving."
He rolled his eyes and set the food on the counter. "Where is the table?"
"I told you that I am moving. I've been selling off all of my furniture all morning."
Jeff walked up and put a hand on my forehead. "Are you alright, Christy?"
"Never been better." I pulled out all of the food containers and broke a fork out of the plastic wrapper.
"Please tell me you aren't going to eat right out of the container."
"I am," I replied as I dug in to the frittata. "I just sold off all of my plates and utensils."
Jeff put down his fork and walked off down the hallway. I kept eating. I wanted to be on a full stomach when I drove off.
"You are serious?" he said as he came back up the hallway.
"So very."
"You did not tell me that last night."
"You did not ask."
"Was it something that I did?"
If I could slam my fork down for the extra added drama then I would have, but the plastic fork would not have had the same effect as a metal one.
"Why do you think that everything in my life revolves around you?"
"Christy, why do you want to act like we are not in love?"
He gazed deeply into my eyes with those soft baby blues. There was a time that he would hook me with those eyes, convince me to do anything that he wanted.
Not today.
"We are not in love. Where on earth would you get that idea, Jeff?"
"The past two years that we spent with one another. Didn't that mean anything to you?"
He slipped his arms around my waist, nuzzling his lips in that delicate spot behind my ear that always seemed to make me go crazy.
"It did. But it doesn't right now."
He looked around, confusion setting in on his face.
"Moving?" He sucked his teeth, snatching the plate of frittata from me.
I gladly let it go and went for the home fried potatoes with the peppers and sausage.
"Yes. Moving."
"So are you going uptown or downtown?" He was not even looking at me, instead, concentrating on the food in front of him.
"Out of town."
I was so happy that he brought some orange juice to go with our breakfast. I gulped down the juice, loving the fact that he always remembered to get me the one with no pulp.
His laugh was so loud and hearty, I thought that he was going to choke on the food that he was eating. Fully prepared to do the Heimlich on him, I sat my food down.
"Out of town? Come on Christy. What is really going on here? Are you having a mid life crisis?"
I was slightly offended. "First off, I'm only twenty-seven, so I don't think that I qualify for a mid life crisis."
That was more like his department. At almost forty, Jeff was closer to mid life than I was. That was what made me so frustrated about him. He was supposed to be more grown up than I was, and although he had the career together, he was still out there trying to sow his wild oats and live life as a playboy.
"What's second?" he asked, slyly grinning.
"There is no second," I replied.
"Well then why did you say 'first off'?"
If I wasn't enjoying my last meal from my favorite diner so much, I would have thrown the food at him, plastering his face with grits and bacon. But Jeff was not worth it and I was ready to go and move on.
"Thanks for breakfast. I need to throw the last of my things in my car. You want to walk me out?"
"So you are really going to do this?"
"I am. And I'm doing it right now."
"But there are still things here in your apartment. What are you going to do with the rest of it?"
"Carla is going to take care of everything for me." My next door neighbor was a Godsend. She was an older woman that lived alone and was one hell of a baker. We often spent our evenings talking about life and love over one of her pound cakes and a bottle of wine.
"Oh. Well."
I waited for him to blurt something out, but he did not. It was one of the first times I could remember that Jeff was speechless. If I was not mistaken, he appeared to be hurt. I was not sure why. We had broken up and as far as I knew, he moved on with some young girl that caught his eye, pleased him in bed, and followed him around like a lost puppy. Why would he even be the least bit concerned about me?
"Well. Let me grab my bags. I really need to hit the road."
There was no way that I was going to let on that I had no real destination, therefore I had no real reason to get on the road at a certain time. I just wanted to get going so I would not second guess myself.
When I locked the door, everything felt so final. Carla answered the door on the first knock.
"My Darling," she said, arms open wide.
I did not want to make this goodbye too long because I was sure that I would burst out in tears if Carla hugged me any longer.
"Thank you," I whispered to her. I meant that in more ways than one and Carla knew it. I passed her the keys and wiped the one stray tear that escaped.
"Call me when you get there," she yelled after me.
I barely turned around when I waved. If I looked at her, I knew that I would completely break down.
Jeff opened my car door for me and then leaned against the frame.
"I need to get in there." He was blocking me from getting in the driver's seat.
"Where is there?"
"What?"
"There. Carla said for you to call her when you get there. Where is there?"
"Jeff, come on. Let's stop playing games."
"And what if I am not playing games with you? What if I am serious about being with you? What could I do to make you stay?"
"Are you serious?" I searched his eyes, trying to peek into his soul and see if he was even close to telling me the truth.
I could not tell the difference.
"Why do you always think that I'm joking around with you, Christy?" He threw his hands in the air. "This is why we can't be together."
"Is that what you think, Jeff? The reason that we are not together is because of me?"
He ran his hands through his blonde hair. "If you would just grow up and find yourself, things between us would be so much more stable. I swear, Christy. I'm going to get tired of waiting for you."
Fortunately for me, he had stepped to the side, and I could throw my bag in the car. That was all that I needed to leave.
"Thank you for breakfast, Jeff. And do me a favor. Don't wait for me to grow up and find myself. It may take me a second."
It was not as if I needed that tiny reminder of why I did not need to be with Jeff, but it was most certainly welcomed. He leaned in to kiss me, but I ducked and slid in to the driver's seat.
Pulling the door closed forced him to move completely out of the way. Hopefully the fact that he was nodding meant that he got the point. I waved as I drove off. Seeing him in the rearview was a wonderful end to the Jeff and Christy saga.
With some tunes playing, belly full, and my mood full of excitement, I rode off toward the highway. My plan was to travel west. Although I had dreams of going to California, I knew that the cost of living would be quite expensive. And besides, living in New Orleans, I had enough of the fast life. It would be great to settle down and live at a slower pace. There would be plenty of time to think about what I wanted to do with my life as I drove through Texas.
About two hours in, I hit a stride, and by the time I hit the Texas/ Louisiana border, I was more than ready to live my new life. Crossing the state lines made it all the more real and that's when the tears started falling.
It hit me that I had really just gotten up and left all that I knew. To some, that may look downright insane. To me, it was just as insane,
but completely necessary. I wanted this new life so badly, I could taste it. I said a separate prayer that I would find the man of my dreams. The illustrious Mr. Right. Was that even something real or was it like searching for a unicorn?
Driving through the tears was becoming more difficult, but the release was just what I needed to push me forward. There was definitely no turning back. And I did not want to do so.
I needed to pull over and refuel as well as stretch my legs. For a moment, I wished I had someone to road trip with. Like a good female friend or something like that, but I needed to be in this alone. Otherwise, I would not appreciate the change that was going to happen in my life.
It was apparent that I was in Texas. Everything was definitely bigger in Texas. Men in oversized cowboy hats, large gold belt buckles, and elaborate cowboy boots. I actually loved every second of it.
One of my favorite daydreams was of a cowboy that would come and sweep me off of my feet. He would be this strong, strapping, young man. Rich oil tycoon that could easily switch between wearing a perfectly tailored designer suit and a tee-shirt that displayed his muscular biceps and a pair of jeans that showed off his butt. He was easy going, but did not play about his woman and when he loved, he loved hard.
We would complement each other. He would be the yin to my yang. I had been dreaming of this man for years, but never did I run across anyone remotely close to him. It was to the point that I was giving up on finding him. I had actually given up on finding love at all.
What I had with Jeff was not love. As a matter of fact, I was not sure what it was. And I'm not sure that it really mattered at this point. All that did matter was that it was over and I was completely sure of that fact.
The highway signs pointed to a small restaurant off of the highway. There was a gas station right across the street. I could grab a little something for the road, gas up, and maybe get one of the attendants to check my car out before I got back on the road.
"Hi pretty lady. How can I help you?" The attendant came around to the driver's side window.
"I want to fill up my tank and can you take a look under the hood and make sure everything is alright?"
"Certainly." His smile was pleasant and when I looked at him again, his baby face was attractive. He was a flirt, winking at me. David was stitched on his name tag.
"Thank you, David."
He saluted me with a nod and I was fully aware that he was watching me as I walked off to the restaurant. I put in a to-go order and then went to the restroom. When I came back out, I took a seat near the window where I had a clear view of David servicing my car.
He was nice to look at. I could appreciate some good scenery on my journey. Being here made me feel a million miles away from home. Somehow I felt closer to where I was going versus where I had come from.
The waitress brought me my food and I was ready to hit the road.
"So David, what's the verdict?"
He let down the hood, wiping his hands on his handkerchief. "Everything looks real fine. Real fine."
When he said the second fine, he was obviously referring to my long legs that were displayed in the cut off shorts and cowboy boots that I was wearing.
"Thank you, David." I stuffed the money I owed him in his breast pocket. Giving it a pat as I turned to get in the car, I smiled. It felt good to shamelessly flirt and know that a man found you attractive.
"You are mighty welcome, pretty lady."
Politely, David closed the door and gave a tap on the hood to let me know that I was free to drive off.
Next destination was more Texas. It was such an expansive territory it would take me a while to get through. That was alright by me. That gave me more time to think. As if I needed more.
By nightfall, I knew that I should go ahead and pull in for the night and get some rest. I stopped, grabbed some dinner, and found a motel off of the highway that looked relatively safe. I had never slept in a motel before, but this entire journey was supposed to be an adventure right?
I was impressed that the accommodations were better than I assumed they would be. I could definitely get a good night's sleep here. By the time I finished eating and took a shower, I was much too tired to do anything else. This was the most alone that I had ever been in my life and somehow it did not feel lonely. My body was exhausted and my mind had long since been ready for rest.
There had been so much change in the past twenty-four hours and I had not let it defeat me. I smiled just thinking about it as I sank into the bed, clutching the pillow tightly next to me.
That freedom that I was searching for seemed right in my grasp. Sleep came easily and it was the best that I had in a while.