Squeezing my eyes together, I tried to push the image of Lewis’s face out of my head. I couldn’t even think about my parents. Gulping down the rising lump in my throat, I pressed my fingernails into the palm of my hand. Don’t cry.
“How long have you been here, Poppy?” I asked.
She half smiled and walked the few steps from the kitchen table back to the sofa. Sitting down beside me, she squeezed my clenched fist. “Just over a year. Mine is a similar story to Rose’s. I was living on the streets when he found me, and I was eighteen too. ” An adult. Was that why Violet got so angry? Not that it mattered how old any of us were. It’s not like she could know my age. How young do I look? Did he even care?
“Why me then? It doesn’t make sense. I’m not an adult like you. ” If he was even kidnapping adults, maybe it didn’t matter as long as he got his family. I shook my head, blood boiling in anger. “My family will look for me. They’ll find us. ”
“Maybe,” Poppy said and gave me another weak smile. Whatever, she didn’t have to believe me. I knew they wouldn’t just give up. I was not spending years down here like they had.
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A creaking at the cellar door made my heart jump into my throat and my stomach turn. He was coming back. I listened hard but couldn’t hear anything until the slight squeak of the door handle. Why didn’t I hear him outside? The air left my lungs. I felt as if I’d been punched in the stomach. Soundproof. We couldn’t hear anything out there, and more important to him, no one could hear us in here.
Rose stood and walked to the bottom of the stairs to meet him. How could she stand to be anywhere near him? The sight of his adult-preppy appearance and smug face made me want to throw up.
“I’m ordering pizza for dinner,” he announced. “I think we all deserve a treat tonight, and we need to properly welcome Lily to the family. ” My stomach turned again. He is actually insane and needs locking up. He turned to me and smiled. “Lily, we usually get two cheese, a pepperoni, and a barbecue chicken. Is that okay with you? I can order something else if you’d like?”
I stared at him in shock. Was he seriously discussing dinner right after he kidnapped me and pulled a knife on someone else? He was sick, evil, and twisted. I didn’t want to talk to him, ever. Poppy nudged me discreetly, prompting me to answer him. Taking a shaky breath, I gave in and replied, “T-that’s fine. ”
He smiled, flashing his too-perfect white teeth. Everything about him looked flawless—his skin, his hair, his perfectly ironed clothes, his damn teeth. The phrase “wolf in sheep’s clothing” was made for him. “That’s perfect then. I knew you would fit in well. I’ll go and order now. It won’t be long. ”
Without another word, he slowly walked back up the stairs.
The cellar door had been unlocked the whole time he was down here.
I watched him close the door and heard him lock it, angry with myself, as I’d missed the chance to escape. “W-what?” I mumbled. My eyes stung where I had been too stunned to blink. This was all a dream. It had to be. Things like this didn’t happen to me. They didn’t even happen to anyone I knew.
Poppy smiled. “It’s going to be okay. ”
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The only way this could ever be okay would be if I got out before he laid a finger on me.
***
I woke up to someone lightly shaking my arm in an annoying way that I was so used to. I smiled and looked over, expecting Lewis to be grinning back at me. My heart sunk when I saw Rose’s long, dark brown hair and blue eyes. Oh God, how could I have fallen asleep?
Gasping in shock and at the realization that all this wasn’t just a horrible dream, I shoved myself back against the sofa, away from her.
“I’m sorry I scared you, Lily. Clover’s here with the pizza,” she whispered. “Come, sit with us. ” I stopped breathing, my lungs felt like they had an elephant sitting on them. Could I sit with him and eat? Did I even have a choice? Rose put her hand on my shoulder and nudged me forward. “Here, you sit next to Poppy. ” Did he even dictate where we sat?
I tensed as I sat down at the table. He was opposite me and sat there as if nothing was wrong at all. To him this was normal. He never mentioned kidnapping me. It was like to him, I had always been here. Like we really all were family. He really believed we were a family. How bloody delusional was he?
The table was covered in a bright white cotton tablecloth and a fresh vase of pink lilies. The pizza had been removed from the boxes and piled on two large serving dishes on either side of the flowers that I assumed were all for me and my new name.
“Please, help yourself,” he said, gesturing to the food with his hand. I’d rather die. He made it sound as if I had a choice, but the steely look in his cold eyes—and the flash of the knife he pulled from his pocket still fresh on my mind—told me I didn’t. He wanted us to eat as a family, and I knew what he was capable of if I refused.
I reached out and took the slice that was closest to me, quickly retracting my hand so I was as far away from him as possible. He gave me a warm smile, his eyes glowing now. I dropped my eyes to my plastic plate and nibbled at the edge of the pizza.
While Rose, Violet, and Poppy discussed what we would be cooking for dinner the rest of the week, I forced down a few bites in silence. The food felt alien in my stomach. I didn’t mind cheese pizza, but this tasted plastic, and I gagged every time I swallowed the mushed-up food.
Rose held her hand up, gaining my attention even though she wasn’t looking at me. “Oh, Clover, before I forget, we’re getting low on books again. ”
He nodded his head once. “I’ll get you some more. ”
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“Thank you. ” She smiled and sipped her water. I wanted to scream at her. How could she not see how messed up this was? She was so at ease with him, her body turned toward him slightly while Poppy and Violet faced straight ahead, and I was just a statue trying not to be noticed.
“Thank you for your company tonight, girls. I’ll see you in the morning,” he said and rose from his seat. “Have a good evening. ”
My body felt like it had been outside in the snow all day. I was stiff and slow to move. He leaned over and placed a kiss on Rose’s cheek and then Poppy’s and Violet’s. I started breathing faster, gripped with fear. Not me. Please not me. I could hear my pulse smashing in my ears, and bile rose in my throat. He bowed his head toward me and turned and walked away.
I let out a big sigh of relief. I couldn’t let him touch me. He stopped on the top of the stairs and unlocked the door. I didn’t take my eyes off him as he left the room and locked the door from the other side. I wanted to make sure he really had left.
Rose and Poppy got up and gathered the plates together to clean up. There was only one of him and four of us. We could overpower him if we worked together. Had they tried that before, or were they always too scared? I wasn’t even sure if Rose would want to.
“Come and watch a movie with us,” Poppy said. I looked up at her and realized they had cleaned everything away and Rose was now sitting in front of the TV.
I joined them on the sofa and stared at the screen, but I didn’t take anything in. Wrapping my arms around my legs, I sunk back into the sofa to try to make myself disappear. Nothing felt real anymore.
Hours must have passed, because Rose switched the TV off and they all stood. “Lily?” Violet said in a soft voice, as if she were talking to a child. “Come on, we need to all get showered and go to bed. I’ll show you the bathroom. You can go first. ” She led me to the bathroom and gave me some pajamas. I didn’t even question why I was showering instead of collapsing in bed. Whose pajamas were they anyway?
She left me to it. There was no lock on the door. I wished there was so I could shut myself away from them all. Turning the shower on, I ran my hand under the water until it warmed up. Why was I doing this? Because he could kill you without question or hesitation. St
ripping out of my clothes, I stepped into the shower and sunk to the floor. I burst into tears, gasping for breath as my cries turned hysterical. I gripped my hair and closed my eyes as my tears mixed with the hot water.
When my tears had dried up and my head felt like it was going to explode, I forced myself to get out of the shower and get dressed. Crying wasn’t going to get me anywhere, and I didn’t want any more attention than I was already getting. I wrapped the fluffy towel tightly around myself—it smelled fresh, like it was just out of the washer—and opened the bathroom cabinet. I noticed straight away that there were no razors—in their place were two pink boxes of waxing strips. Nothing in the cabinet could cause any damage—to anyone.
Closing the door, I made the mistake of looking at myself in the mirror screwed to the front of the cabinet. My eyes were bloodshot and puffy. I looked like I had been in a scrap with a cage fighter. I spun around, not wanting to see how awful I looked any longer, and pulled on someone else’s pajamas.
“Are you ready for bed?” Rose asked as I walked back into the room. I nodded in response and wrapped my arms around myself. “Okay, I’ll show you where you’ll sleep. ” She led me into the room beside the bathroom. The walls were painted light pink and the furniture was all white. There were four single beds with pink quilt covers and pillows. On the bedside tables were identical light pink lamps. It all matched too well, like it was decorated for quadruplets. “This one is yours,” she said and pointed to the bed against the wall on the left. Mine. I had a bed. This was supposed to be home.
I was too exhausted to argue, so I numbly walked over to the bed and climbed under the cover. Closing my eyes, I prayed sleep would come soon and take me away from here, and that when I woke up I would be in my own room.
4
LEWIS
Sunday, 25th July (Present)
Missing. I repeated the word over and over in my head. Lewis, we need to go now. Summer’s missing. That was what Henry said. His face was pale as he explained that his sister—my girlfriend—hadn’t been seen for hours.
It was almost three o’clock in the morning, and we had been driving around and looking by foot for four hours. Summer didn’t go missing. The longest she’s gone without anyone being able to see or hear her was the ten minutes it took for her to shower. I couldn’t think of a single reason why she would take off and not tell anyone.
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My brother, Theo, drove slowly through the streets. In any other situation, I would be shouting at him to put his foot down or let me drive. Now I wanted to tell him to go even slower. It was pitch-black out and the dim streetlights barely lit any of the bloody ground below them. We could have missed her a thousand times because we couldn’t see properly, but I couldn’t go home and do nothing like my parents suggested. Sitting and waiting would drive me mad.
“Lewis, you okay?” Theo asked again. That same stupid question was shot at me about every ten minutes. What did he think? Of course I’m not fucking okay!
“No,” I mumbled. Where was she? Summer didn’t run off; she wasn’t the type of person to run from anything. She was strong-willed and stubborn. I couldn’t even argue with her properly because she would sit on my bed and tell me to calm down so we could talk and sort it out. She dealt with problems straight on—it was what I both loved and hated about her. Sometimes I just wanted to be pissed off, but she made sure we fixed it.
“We’ll find her, bro. ”
“Yeah. ” I agreed with him but I wasn’t so sure. I hoped we would more than anything, but I had this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that wouldn’t go away. Something definitely wasn’t right. “She could be anywhere by now. ” It had been over seven hours since she was last seen, and since then, absolutely nothing. It was as if she’d just vanished.
“Summer wouldn’t run off,” Theo said.
My heart dropped to my feet. I know. “That’s what I’m afraid of. She wouldn’t run off…someone must have taken her. ”
“Don’t do that, Lewis. Look, we don’t know anything yet. ” He was right; I didn’t know for sure. But I did know Summer. “Do you want to carry on and go into town or turn back and go the other way?”
“Other way. ” Kerri’d said Summer had turned left at the club. We had checked there before coming this way, but we could have missed something. Double-checking couldn’t hurt. Jesus, triple-checking couldn’t hurt. I wanted to search every inch of the town ten times so I knew for sure I hadn’t missed anything.
The police had people out looking around the area where she was last seen, but because it hadn’t been over twenty-four hours, they were reluctant to put too many officers into it. I had never been so damn angry as I was when I found out they were waiting twenty-four hours when she could be anywhere, going through fuck knows what, before they would take it seriously.
Apparently a bunch of our neighbors had started their own search and were going door to door, hoping that someone had seen something. They knew Summer; they knew she wouldn’t run away. Everyone I knew, except Summer’s mum, was out looking. Dawn was told to stay home in case Sum turned up or called. I wouldn’t want to be in her position.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket and checked it for the millionth time—no missed calls. I sighed and held down number 2—speed-dialing her phone again. It started to ring, like it did before, and I held my breath. Please answer, baby. Her voice filled the car, her voice mail told everyone to leave a message and if you were Channing Tatum, yes, she would marry you.
“Babe, please call me back the second you get this. I just need to know you’re okay. I’m going crazy here. I love you, Sum. ” I hung up and clenched the phone in my hand. This is bad.
We drove through the night and into the early morning. My eyes stung from being so tired. As soon as the stores opened, Theo bought some food and energy drinks. I hadn’t been home since we got that call at the nightclub, so I was still in my jeans and shirt.
“I’ll pull over here and we can check the back fields and the park by foot,” I told Theo.
He nodded, stuffing the last of his sandwich into his mouth. “You sure you don’t want anything to eat?”
I shook my head as I pulled up in the parking lot beside the church. “Not hungry. Let’s try the park first. ” He got out of the car and headed over to the gate. I followed, quickly overtaking him. “Summer,” I called out. Of course, she wasn’t going to be here. If she were, she would have been found by now. “Come on, Theo,” I shouted over my shoulder. He didn’t seem to have the urgency I had, but then, he wasn’t in love with her.
With every passing minute she was missing, I was even more lost. I felt sick and my heart wouldn’t fucking slow down. I had no clue what the hell I was going to do if anything had happened to her. “Lewis,” Theo said, “what about down there?”
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I looked to where he was pointing. The overgrown footpath that ran beside the park and between acres of farmland and fields. I nodded and headed that way. Worth a shot—anything, anywhere was worth a shot. The park had been searched a lot, but the overgrown path wouldn’t have been searched thoroughly enough in the dark. Whatever happened, I wasn’t giving up until we had her back.
***
“Anything?” I asked Dawn as I walked through the door. We had found nothing. No trace at all—all my hope was pinned on her.
She shook her head and whispered, “No. ” That one little word felt like being stabbed. Her eyes were bloodshot from lack of sleep and crying, and I pictured Summer the same, waiting for us to find her. The remains of Dawn’s day-old makeup were smudged under her eyes and down her cheeks. “The police are starting a proper search today, though. They’ll find her. ” She nodded her head as if she were telling herself the same thing, convincing herself.
“Right, I’m going,” Summer’s dad, Daniel, announced. He stopped as he saw me. “Oh, Lewis. Anything?” I shook my
head. It was as if she just vanished. His shoulders were slumped, and from someone who was always strong and positive, it made me fear the worst. “I’ll be back later,” he said and gave Dawn a brief kiss on the cheek. He looked as exhausted as I felt.
“Are you hungry?” Dawn asked, staring into space. “Your mum’s making food. I don’t know what. ”
“Thanks, Dawn,” Theo said. “Why don’t we go to the kitchen?” He led her through, wrapping his arm around her back to help her like she was a sick old lady.
I didn’t want to hang around. I just wanted to find out what the plan was and get back out there. Sitting around eating wasn’t going to get Summer back. “Theo, Lewis,” my mum gushed, throwing a tea towel down. “Sit, sit. ”
“Thanks for cooking, Emma,” Dawn said. Mum smiled sadly, her eyes showing how scared she was.
“I don’t want to sit. I just want to know what I should be doing. Is someone coming to sort a proper search out yet?” I asked. Surely the police had a plan rather than just sending everyone out looking randomly?
“They’ve already been, sweetheart,” Mum replied. “They’re starting with a thorough search of the area they believe Summer was last—”
“How do they know that?”
“Know what?
I sighed in frustration. “Where she last was?”
Mum shrugged. “I’m not sure, a combination of the direction she went in, where a young girl would go, and how long it was before Kerri called her and noticed she wasn’t answering to work out how far away she was likely to be. I don’t know exactly. ”
“So they’re just guessing? They don’t even know Summer and they’re guessing where she was likely to go?”
“Lewis, calm down,” Theo ordered.
“No. Fuck this!” They didn’t have a clue and now Summer could be anywhere.
I stormed out of the house. I didn’t know where I was going, but I had to get out. My girlfriend was missing, and I had no clue where she was or how to find her. And it didn’t seem like the police had the slightest clue where to start either.